Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Randomize
