so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
