new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
