what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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