Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
even my farts smell like vagina
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
