Buhtt sex?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize