Whats the glycemic index on semen?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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