Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
