If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
