Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
