yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
