Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
