: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
