I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
