just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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