Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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