She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
