you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Even my vagina gasped.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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