omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
These tits shall not be calmed
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
