Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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