my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
