Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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