That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
