he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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