In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
