i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I think I just shit out all my problems.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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