Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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