ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
