I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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