This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
foreskin is a definite game changer
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
