You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
