yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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