so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
