forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
