Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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