where am i from again
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
