im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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