That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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