im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
My pussy is not your playground.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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