glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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