just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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