I met the friendliest cop last night
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Someone shattered a urinal.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize