Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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