That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
