Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
