Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
