id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
