you would pick up someone in the library
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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