She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
