Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
